General Context:
Content and Approach (2021):
Pedagogical tools (2021):
Parental involvement (2021):
While 1991 had a lack of information, 2021 has a surfeit of distorted information. Boys learn aggression from porn; girls learn to perform like actresses. Belgian studies in 2020 showed that 1 in 3 boys aged 14-16 think that choking a partner during sex is "normal." Teachers are scrambling to de-program this.
The journey from 1991 to 2021 in Belgium represents a maturation of society. In 1991, the goal was to prevent accidents (unwanted pregnancy and disease). By 2021, the goal was to build healthy, respectful, and self-aware human beings.
While the awkwardness of puberty remains a universal constant, the 2021 Belgian student is far better equipped to navigate the complexities of growing up than the student of 1991 ever was.
Navigating the shift from "just friends" to "crush territory" is one of the biggest parts of growing up. During puberty, your brain and body aren't just changing physically; your emotions and the way you view others are leveling up, too. 1. The "Spark" and New Emotions
Puberty involves a surge of hormones that can make your emotions feel more intense. You might start experiencing:
Crushes: A sudden, strong attraction to someone. It can feel like "butterflies" in your stomach or being extra nervous around them.
Infatuation: Being so focused on someone that you only see their best traits.
Fluidity: It’s normal for your attractions to change or for you to feel unsure about who you are attracted to as you learn more about yourself. 2. Building a Healthy Romantic Storyline
A great relationship—whether in a book or in real life—is built on a solid foundation. If you’re starting a romantic journey, keep these "green flags" in mind: General Context:
Mutual Respect: Both people value each other’s opinions, hobbies, and privacy.
Communication: Being able to talk about your feelings honestly, even when things are awkward.
Boundaries: Knowing where you end and the other person begins. This means respecting a "no" or a "not yet" without any pressure.
Support: A partner should be your biggest cheerleader, not someone who makes you feel small or holds you back. 3. Understanding Consent
Consent is the most important part of any romantic storyline. It’s not just about physical touch; it’s about making sure everyone is comfortable with the pace of the relationship. Consent must be: Freely given: No pressure or guilt-tripping. Informed: Everyone knows what’s happening.
Reversible: You can change your mind at any time, for any reason.
Enthusiastic: It should be a clear "Yes!", not a "Maybe" or a "Fine, I guess." 4. Handling Rejection and Breakups
Not every romantic storyline has a "happily ever after," and that’s okay.
If you get rejected: It hurts, but it isn't a reflection of your worth. It just means you aren't the right match for that person right now.
If you need to end things: Be kind but clear. It’s better to be honest than to lead someone on.
Moving on: Give yourself time to feel sad, then focus on your friends and the things you love to do. 5. Digital Romance and Safety
In today’s world, a lot of romantic storylines happen on screens. Content and Approach (2021):
Keep it Private: Be careful about sharing personal information or private photos. Once something is sent, you lose control of where it goes.
Social Media vs. Reality: Remember that what people post online is a "highlight reel." Don't compare your real-life relationship to someone else's filtered photos.
The Bottom Line: Puberty is a time of discovery. Whether you’re interested in dating now or would rather wait, the most important relationship you’ll ever have is the one with yourself.
In the attic of their family home in Ghent, seventeen-year-old Lise was rummaging through an old box marked "1991." It belonged to her father, Johan. Inside, amidst old cassette tapes and faded concert tickets, she found a small, blue notebook.
It was from his sixth-grade class, the year the school introduced "Sexual Education."
Lise opened it. The notes were scribbled in messy pre-teen handwriting. The first page read: Puberty. The body changes. Hormones.
She turned the page. Boys: Voice drops, hair on face, wet dreams. Girls: Breasts grow, menstruation, hips widen.
It was clinical. It was a list of biological events treated almost like a medical diagnosis. There were crude cartoons of reproductive organs, and in the margins, Johan had drawn a shield and a sword—typical boy humor masking the awkwardness of the time.
"Hey, Dad!" Lise called down the stairs. "I found your biology notes from the stone age."
Johan, now in his late forties, climbed the stairs with a smile. He looked at the notebook and chuckled. "Ah, 1991. The year we learned everything and nothing."
"What do you mean?" Lise asked. "It covers the basics."
"It covered the mechanics," Johan said, sitting on a dusty crate. "In 1991, in Belgium, the focus was on prevention. Don’t get pregnant, don’t get diseases. We learned how the body worked, but we never learned how the heart worked. We never talked about how scary it was, or how to say 'no,' or that it was okay to feel confused." Puberty topics in detail (2021):
Lise pulled her own phone out of her pocket. She opened a PDF file she had received in her modern "Relationship and Sexuality Education" (RSE) class that very afternoon. She handed the phone to her father.
The title on the screen wasn't Biology. It was: Relationships, Boundaries, and You.
Johan scrolled. He saw sections on "Consent," "Gender Identity," "Online Safety," and "Emotional Intimacy." There were diagrams, but they weren't just of bodies; they were of communication cycles—how to listen, how to express needs, how to recognize non-verbal cues.
"This is what we did today," Lise said. "The teacher, Ms. Van Der Berg, started by saying, 'Sexual education isn't just about what happens below your waist. It’s about what happens between people.'"
Lise pointed to a highlighted section. "We talked about boundaries. Not just physical ones, but emotional ones. We did this exercise where we practiced saying, 'I’m not comfortable with that,' without feeling like we had to apologize."
Johan looked from the phone to his old blue notebook. In 1991, he remembered the boys snickering in the back of the room while the girls looked down at their desks in embarrassment. It was a subject shrouded in mystery and taboo.
"It is different," Johan admitted, his voice softening. "In my time, we were told that puberty was a storm you had to weather alone. We thought the 'wet dreams' note was funny because we were terrified. We didn't have the words to talk about the loneliness of it."
"We talk about that now," Lise said. "We have a whole module on mental health during puberty. How the brain develops differently than the body. It helps to know that I’m not 'crazy' when my mood swings; it’s just my prefrontal cortex rewiring."
Johan felt a wave of relief. He looked at his daughter—confident, articulate, and equipped not just with facts, but with emotional tools.
"You know," Johan said, "In 1991, the only rule was 'Be careful.' That was it. We were given a map of the minefield, but not a compass."
"And now?" Lise asked, taking the phone back.
"Now, you have the compass," Johan smiled. "You know where you are going, and more importantly, you know that you own the map."