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As a teacher I wanted to give assignments to my students, but (IMHO) the available simulators were not intuitive enough. We worked out the first version of this simulator with José Antonio Matte, an engineering student at PUC Chile. The simulator was functional but a bit unstable, so I created this second version. Please let me know if the simulator is being used in new institutions. If you find any bugs or have comments feel free to contact me.
Not everyone who cheats family is a clinical sociopath. Often, they are driven by rationalized entitlement. Here are common justifications they use:
Underneath the rationalization often lies deep insecurity, jealousy, and a sense of scarcity. Family cheaters frequently feel that life has been unfair to them, and they see family assets as a compensation mechanism. They don't see their parents' money as belonging to the parents or the sibling group—they see it as rightfully theirs, and anyone else getting any is a loss.
Some family members cheat by twisting emotions to get advantages (e.g., “If you don’t let me win, it proves you don’t love me”).
Many families start small businesses together. A restaurant, a construction company, a real estate venture. One family member handles the books. Over time, they begin skimming cash, writing fake checks to themselves, or secretly forming a competing LLC that funnels away clients. When confronted, they use the family bond as a shield: “How could you accuse your own brother?”
Family cheaters exist because we let them get away with it in the name of "keeping the peace."
Stop keeping a peace that doesn't exist. Start protecting your truth.
You don't owe loyalty to people who cheat you of yours. family cheaters
Have you dealt with a family cheater? Share your story (anonymously) in the comments below. Let’s support each other.
"Family Cheaters"
In twisted households, where bonds are worn, Lies a deceit that festers, unadorned. A family cheater, with a heart of stone, Betrays the trust of those who call them home.
With cunning guile, they weave a web of lies, As loved ones suffer, with tears that dry. The cheater's smile, a mask to conceal, The pain they cause, with each deceitful reveal.
Their actions speak louder than words can say, As family members struggle to find their way. The cheater's path, a road of destruction wide, Leaves ruin in its wake, where love once did reside.
But still, we search for reasons, why they stray, Was childhood trauma, the cause of their disarray? Or is it simply, a lack of empathy and care, That drives them to cheat, without a single snare? Not everyone who cheats family is a clinical sociopath
Perhaps, it's a cry for help, a desperate plea, A misguided attempt, to set their soul free. But whatever the reason, the pain remains, And loved ones are left, to pick up the stains.
So let this be a lesson, to all who can see, That family cheaters, bring misery. For in their selfish pursuit, of fleeting delight, They sacrifice the love, that once shone so bright.
But still, we hold on to hope, a glimmer of light, That cheaters may change, and make things right. For in the power of forgiveness, we find our way, To heal the wounds, and bring a brighter day.
Family "cheating" or infidelity is a complex phenomenon that often reveals deep-seated emotional deficits within an individual, rather than flaws in the partner or family unit. While traditionally associated with physical acts, modern definitions of betrayal in a family context have expanded to include emotional affairs and secretive financial behaviors. The Psychological Roots of Family Betrayal
Understanding why a family member "cheats" often involves looking at psychological triggers rather than situational excuses:
The 80/20 Rule: A common psychological theory where individuals risk a relationship that provides 80% of their needs to chase the 20% they feel is missing, often for temporary validation or excitement. Have you dealt with a family cheater
Ego and Control: Many chronic cheaters are motivated by the "thrill" of getting away with a secret, which provides a false sense of total control and an ego boost.
Lack of Self-Reflection: Serial betrayers often lack the capacity for self-reflection and may blame their spouse or circumstances for their choices rather than taking responsibility for their character flaws. Redefining Infidelity: Modern Examples
Beyond physical acts like kissing or sexual activity, family "cheating" often includes:
Financial Infidelity: Secretly giving or receiving money from someone else without a spouse's knowledge.
Digital Secrecy: Deleting messages, saving contacts under fake names, or hiding location data to maintain external "friendships".
Emotional Affairs: Building intense emotional bonds that bypass the primary partnership, sometimes referred to as having "office husbands" or "office wives". Demographics and Trends
Infidelity is not as rare as many believe, with nearly one-fourth of all marriages experiencing it at some point. Why People Cheat in Relationships - Mark Manson
Family cheating—behaviors involving deception, infidelity, or betrayal within family systems—affects relational stability, mental health, and child outcomes. This paper reviews definitions and types of family cheating, theoretical frameworks (attachment theory, family systems theory, social exchange theory), prevalence, predictors (individual, relational, sociocultural), impacts on partners and children, assessment methods, interventions, and directions for future research.